dear baldmonkey

Dear baldmonkey,
I run several LANs with me as the administrator and the students and staff as restricted users. All machines are running either Windows 2000 or XP.
As part of the students’ I.T courses they need to demonstrate being able to change the system time, however restricted users cannot do this - only administrators. I’ve tried tweaking every setting in Active Directory but to no avail.
Is there away of allowing restricted users to do this, as I don’t want the students to have admin rights?
Mark

I used to like that Turtle game. That was good. It was like etch-a-sketch. But etch-a-sketch is shit because it doesn’t use a computer. I tell you what is good; Lego. Some people moan about how the pieces are all too specialised these days. They prefer the old days when there were only a few different bricks and you had to work with those. Not me. I fucking love Lego. The more different bricks they have, the better. I especially like Star Wars Lego.
If we examine your problem more closely, you want some students to do something without the risk of them being pricks. Students are pricks. Whiny, know-it-all pricks who know nothing. They are easy to mug though and are often stupid enough to carry lots of cash and iPods.
The chances are none of them will need to change time in real life. I wouldn’t worry about it. Tell them to just do it in Notepad.

Dear baldmonkey,
A forum I frequent appears to be down, and I am afraid that I cannot live without it. Is it because my computer is shit, or did someone type “Google” into Google? Please answer me as soon as possible before I am forced to talk to actual real people who actually really exist.
Thanky,
heckzecutive, teh internets

Good grief, I hate you “people”. With your “teh” and your “LOL”. I expect everyone on the site hates you too and has IPed your server domain with hacks. Try switching your computer off and on again. In the bath.

Dear baldmonkey
I have a problem with my sat nav. In the past it has always been very polite to me but of late is has started making rude remarks. It also seems to be trying to kill me by urging me to go faster at main road junctions.
Do I have a case for claiming a refund?
Thanks in anticipation.

Your problem is probably not the sat nav unit but some form of mental illness involving paranoid hallucinations. This is probably being caused by the American government who are secret testing a brain-ray on you. The big clue is that this computer isn’t even real. You are staring at a blank space and tapping away on an empty desk. The people you live with are just guards. They are laughing at you outside the door.

Dear baldmonkey,
MY FUCKING CUNTING PHONE COST ME £400 AND FOR NO REASON IS REFUSING TO SEND MESSAGES BECAUSE IT’S A FUCKING BASTARD FUCKING CUNT. MAKE IT WORK.

What you’ve done, I expect, is you’ve bought that phone off a shady character in the pub. If you look closely you will find you have paid £400 for a brick with the numbers zero to nine and the word “Nokia” written on it in felt tip. It’s a popular scam. If you use the donate button to send me £400 I will send you an equally brickish replacement. Honest.